Never has a national tragedy affected me like the Newtown tragedy has. I have wept a good part of the last 4 days. I am holding back tears as I begin to type this post. Those sweet, innocent, beautiful lives lost. I think my heart has grown exponentially bigger with every child I have. It is bursting with so much love,my whole being swells up every time I look into one of my girls' eyes. The flip side is that any unfortunate situation involving a child tears me wide open. My heart is so big and vulnerable these days. Maybe it's also the fact that I have a child in elementary school. I can (almost) put myself in that position. Hearing there was a shooting, rushing to the school as fast as you've ever gotten to anywhere in your life, yet it still would take too long, desperately searching for your child..... I know the teachers at my daughter's school that would have been the heroes. When I picked her up from school Friday, I saw all those loving parents waiting for their precious kindergartners. I saw them hug them tight. I wept again. Every single parent in our nation was affected by this tragedy. My newsfeed was filled with 'hug your kids a little tighter today'. I couldn't hug my kids any tighter. I hug them as tight as I can every single day of their lives.
So yes, hug your kids tighter today. Tomorrow. And every other day.
Hug your kids tighter when they are making you insane.
Hug your kids tighter when they're not listening to you.
Hug your kids tighter when they are throwing a fit.
Hug your kids tighter when you just need a break.
Hug your kids tighter when the last thing you want to do is hug them. That's when they need it. That's when they need to know you love them.
It is time we start loving our children unconditionally. So many of us feel that we do, but we don't. We let them cry it out. We punish and discipline them, verbally, physically, and emotionally when they're not 'behaving'. We've been told it's in their best interest. We see them as inherently bad so we have to shape them up and control them and teach them. Let's just stop...
They're here to teach us. To remind us what we've lost about ourselves when society imprints us, our beliefs and our perspective. We love our children more than our own lives, so why do we treat them the worst. We don't give them respect. We are not respecting their bodies, their thoughts, or their feelings.
So yes, let's talk about gun control. Let's talk about mental illness. But let us not forget to talk about how we treat our children.
It starts with unconditional love AND unconditional parenting. (Read the book. It has changed my life.)
