Never has a national tragedy affected me like the Newtown tragedy has. I have wept a good part of the last 4 days. I am holding back tears as I begin to type this post. Those sweet, innocent, beautiful lives lost. I think my heart has grown exponentially bigger with every child I have. It is bursting with so much love,my whole being swells up every time I look into one of my girls' eyes. The flip side is that any unfortunate situation involving a child tears me wide open. My heart is so big and vulnerable these days. Maybe it's also the fact that I have a child in elementary school. I can (almost) put myself in that position. Hearing there was a shooting, rushing to the school as fast as you've ever gotten to anywhere in your life, yet it still would take too long, desperately searching for your child..... I know the teachers at my daughter's school that would have been the heroes. When I picked her up from school Friday, I saw all those loving parents waiting for their precious kindergartners. I saw them hug them tight. I wept again. Every single parent in our nation was affected by this tragedy. My newsfeed was filled with 'hug your kids a little tighter today'. I couldn't hug my kids any tighter. I hug them as tight as I can every single day of their lives.
So yes, hug your kids tighter today. Tomorrow. And every other day.
Hug your kids tighter when they are making you insane.
Hug your kids tighter when they're not listening to you.
Hug your kids tighter when they are throwing a fit.
Hug your kids tighter when you just need a break.
Hug your kids tighter when the last thing you want to do is hug them. That's when they need it. That's when they need to know you love them.
It is time we start loving our children unconditionally. So many of us feel that we do, but we don't. We let them cry it out. We punish and discipline them, verbally, physically, and emotionally when they're not 'behaving'. We've been told it's in their best interest. We see them as inherently bad so we have to shape them up and control them and teach them. Let's just stop...
They're here to teach us. To remind us what we've lost about ourselves when society imprints us, our beliefs and our perspective. We love our children more than our own lives, so why do we treat them the worst. We don't give them respect. We are not respecting their bodies, their thoughts, or their feelings.
So yes, let's talk about gun control. Let's talk about mental illness. But let us not forget to talk about how we treat our children.
It starts with unconditional love AND unconditional parenting. (Read the book. It has changed my life.)
Monday, December 17, 2012
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
Passion about a video
Passion is a funny thing. It has the power to bring thousands of people together. It has the power to create change. It has the power to tear people apart.
I never really knew what I was passionate about, until I recently became a mother for the 2nd time. But this post isn't about what I'm passionate about. This is just about passion itself.
There is a viral video making it's rounds on the interwebs of Facebook and Twitter for a genuinely worthy cause. The cause isn't something I'm passionate about. After a little debate with myself, that went something like this; Me: Should I share this video? Me 2: Well, it isn't THE cause that you are passionate about - so do you want to just be one of those 'followers'. Me: You know what, even if this isn't what ignites a fire in me, it's something minimal I can do to spread the word; I shared the video.
People now, as I was afraid they would, assume that since I have shared the video, that I am passionate about this cause; that I should be willing to lay my life on the line for this cause. I shared the video before doing my full due diligence, and jumped right on the back of that bandwagon. I did, then, do a little research (reading a couple of opposing opinions) and still did not regret my decision to share the video. Who cares if it's a bandwagon. Most people probably felt the same way I did; that it was the least they could do to share the information. I didn't share the information in hopes to start a revolution or to try to raise billions of dollars for the cause. I just thought it was information that people should know.
I shared that story to get to the funny thing about passion. It seems it's some people's passion to knock people for being bandwagon jumpers or trying to do a little bit of good. That baffles me. Unless I'm willing to lay my life on the line for something, I shouldn't care about it at all? Because we can't help everyone, we shouldn't help anyone? I hope that's not the world I live in. Well, it isn't the world I live in. So, I hope that's not the world other people live in. Because an issue is much more complicated than the 30 minute youtube video portrays the solution to be, we shouldn't raise awareness? I guess people would just rather complain about people caring a little bit about something just so they aren't a follower or bandwagon jumper.
Another thing that intrigues me is the passionate debates that ensue when someone opposes or supports a cause or opinion. It seems that neither of the people on either side are truly passionate about the cause, yet for whatever reason we get so passionate about defending our opinions and positions. Humans are funny creatures, aren't they. I suppose it's because you formed your opinion based on your perception and beliefs that lie way deeper than the surface of the cause or opinion; and of course you are passionate about whatever beliefs lead you to form your opinion in the first place. We should all remember that though when having these arguments.
And with that realization, I have managed to subdue my desire to argue and am content with having spread the video to raise awareness. Plus, it's lunch time.
I'll keep my passionate energy to use for the causes that do ignite a burning fire in me.
Here is the video: Kony 2012
I never really knew what I was passionate about, until I recently became a mother for the 2nd time. But this post isn't about what I'm passionate about. This is just about passion itself.
There is a viral video making it's rounds on the interwebs of Facebook and Twitter for a genuinely worthy cause. The cause isn't something I'm passionate about. After a little debate with myself, that went something like this; Me: Should I share this video? Me 2: Well, it isn't THE cause that you are passionate about - so do you want to just be one of those 'followers'. Me: You know what, even if this isn't what ignites a fire in me, it's something minimal I can do to spread the word; I shared the video.
People now, as I was afraid they would, assume that since I have shared the video, that I am passionate about this cause; that I should be willing to lay my life on the line for this cause. I shared the video before doing my full due diligence, and jumped right on the back of that bandwagon. I did, then, do a little research (reading a couple of opposing opinions) and still did not regret my decision to share the video. Who cares if it's a bandwagon. Most people probably felt the same way I did; that it was the least they could do to share the information. I didn't share the information in hopes to start a revolution or to try to raise billions of dollars for the cause. I just thought it was information that people should know.
I shared that story to get to the funny thing about passion. It seems it's some people's passion to knock people for being bandwagon jumpers or trying to do a little bit of good. That baffles me. Unless I'm willing to lay my life on the line for something, I shouldn't care about it at all? Because we can't help everyone, we shouldn't help anyone? I hope that's not the world I live in. Well, it isn't the world I live in. So, I hope that's not the world other people live in. Because an issue is much more complicated than the 30 minute youtube video portrays the solution to be, we shouldn't raise awareness? I guess people would just rather complain about people caring a little bit about something just so they aren't a follower or bandwagon jumper.
Another thing that intrigues me is the passionate debates that ensue when someone opposes or supports a cause or opinion. It seems that neither of the people on either side are truly passionate about the cause, yet for whatever reason we get so passionate about defending our opinions and positions. Humans are funny creatures, aren't they. I suppose it's because you formed your opinion based on your perception and beliefs that lie way deeper than the surface of the cause or opinion; and of course you are passionate about whatever beliefs lead you to form your opinion in the first place. We should all remember that though when having these arguments.
And with that realization, I have managed to subdue my desire to argue and am content with having spread the video to raise awareness. Plus, it's lunch time.
I'll keep my passionate energy to use for the causes that do ignite a burning fire in me.
Here is the video: Kony 2012
Sunday, February 26, 2012
Oatmeal is a Finger Food
She is an excellent eater. It seems like she never stops eating and most of it is pretty healthy. I took a class to prepare myself for a task that I thought would take over my life, making our own baby food. Fortunately, somewhere along the way, I discovered 'baby led weaning'. What a lifesaver! It made instinctual and logical sense, plus I wasn't going to have to spend endless hours steaming, pureeing and freezing 1,000 different types of vegetables.
I did learn something in that class that sticks with me though. The lady recommended a book, I have no idea what the book is, but a quote from the book went something like this; "It is our job as parents to decide, buy and prepare the food for our children. It is the child's job to decide how much of what they want to eat." BINGO. No food wars here. Granted she is only 14 months old. That is the philosophy I will stick with though. And no, this doesn't mean she will get special cooked meals a la grilled cheese when everyone else is eating their grains and veggies. Everyone gets what is cooked.
We just don't trust and respect children enough. They know what their bodies need, when they're hungry and when they're not. If you take the control out of 'finishing everything on your plate' then there won't be any control battles over them refusing to eat. At least that's what I'm banking on. I know it won't be all rainbows and butterflies at every meal time. Hell, I'm usually offended every night when everyone isn't asking for thirds of what I cooked for dinner. But at least I know I've done my job.
Besides, who wouldn't want a free oatmeal facial every morning?
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Eating for 3
I started this blog as an online journal for my pregnancy with Sock Monkey. My only post about my pregnancy was when I was about 22 weeks. Ironically, that's where I'm at in pregnancy number three. I've had it on my daily to-do list every day for the last 2 months to keep up with this blog. Here is my first attempt. Hopefully the next post won't be at 22 weeks with number four (Lord help me!).
Although I'm showing, I still don't feel pregnant. Besides the heart burn and constant peeing. At my 1st midwife appointment, I gave them an estimate of my weight, what I've been hovering around for the last few years (it was the midwife's first day and my first time with a midwife - so neither of us knew that the scale was sitting in the bathroom waiting to let me know the magic number). At my 2nd appointment, we were both a little more savvy, so I actually weighed myself. I was shocked at the number. I haven't seen it in years. Plus, I was, what, 12 weeks pregnant. It was a good number, by the way. 3rd appointment - same number as the last appointment. What the hell. I was secretly loving this no weight gain with a number I would be happy with any other time other then pregnancy. I was also secretly scared. Why am I not gaining weight? Is that safe for the baby?
I am still nursing Sock Monkey, so I think that's the biggest contributing factor. It is definitely a calorie burner. I've also decided to ditch my former lazy ways this year, so I basically don't stop moving from the time I get home until bed time- all while carrying around a 20lb toddler.
However, I don't think I was eating enough. Really, I'm eating for 3. I certainly wasn't not eating. That will never be an issue with me. Never. So I've upped my game. Phew, if I thought my life revolved around food before.. you should see me now. I eat around 6-7 times a day. I do need to focus better on WHAT I'm eating. I generally try to eat pretty healthy, but since I've given myself license to consume as many calories as possible, I'll admit it.. many sweet treats find their way to my mouth.
Awesomely enough, my thighs still fit in my jeans. I'd like to keep it that way throughout this pregnancy though. Thankfully Sock Monkey shows no signs of being ready to wean, so I've got that calorie burner in my back pocket. As I polish off a 2 inch thick piece of a cinnamon bread loaf and heartburn begins to jeopardize my comfort level, I have to remember that I'm growing a human here. Only the best stuff needs to go in.
Let's just say, I can't wait to get on the scale again at my next midwife's appointment.
Although I'm showing, I still don't feel pregnant. Besides the heart burn and constant peeing. At my 1st midwife appointment, I gave them an estimate of my weight, what I've been hovering around for the last few years (it was the midwife's first day and my first time with a midwife - so neither of us knew that the scale was sitting in the bathroom waiting to let me know the magic number). At my 2nd appointment, we were both a little more savvy, so I actually weighed myself. I was shocked at the number. I haven't seen it in years. Plus, I was, what, 12 weeks pregnant. It was a good number, by the way. 3rd appointment - same number as the last appointment. What the hell. I was secretly loving this no weight gain with a number I would be happy with any other time other then pregnancy. I was also secretly scared. Why am I not gaining weight? Is that safe for the baby?
I am still nursing Sock Monkey, so I think that's the biggest contributing factor. It is definitely a calorie burner. I've also decided to ditch my former lazy ways this year, so I basically don't stop moving from the time I get home until bed time- all while carrying around a 20lb toddler.
However, I don't think I was eating enough. Really, I'm eating for 3. I certainly wasn't not eating. That will never be an issue with me. Never. So I've upped my game. Phew, if I thought my life revolved around food before.. you should see me now. I eat around 6-7 times a day. I do need to focus better on WHAT I'm eating. I generally try to eat pretty healthy, but since I've given myself license to consume as many calories as possible, I'll admit it.. many sweet treats find their way to my mouth.
Awesomely enough, my thighs still fit in my jeans. I'd like to keep it that way throughout this pregnancy though. Thankfully Sock Monkey shows no signs of being ready to wean, so I've got that calorie burner in my back pocket. As I polish off a 2 inch thick piece of a cinnamon bread loaf and heartburn begins to jeopardize my comfort level, I have to remember that I'm growing a human here. Only the best stuff needs to go in.
Let's just say, I can't wait to get on the scale again at my next midwife's appointment.
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